Please keep praying  

They Will Return
You are right the best thing for your loved one, your family member, or your friend is to hold on to their faith. It is tough to be on the sidelines unable to persuade them to hold on. Don’t give up, your fighting in prayer for them is worth it. And you are not alone. This site is a place to connect with others who feel like you and we also have some tools to help you cope. 
We are starting a Facebook group for those who have loved one who have walked away from the faith. Register here and we will connect you. 

 

Our Resources 

To help understand your loved one. 
Spiritual Prepper by Jake McCandless
 

 

 

 

Recommended Resources

To help understand your loved one.

If God Disappears by David Sanford
 

 

To help reach out.

Hold_On Tools. 

 

 

Love No Matter What

Have you ever winced upon learning that a long-time friend has left your church? Even harder, did your friend appear to doubt much of what he or she used to believe about God, the Bible, Jesus Christ, the Church, and the Christian faith?

If so, how did you respond?

That’s a tough question to answer, isn’t it?

Over the years, after making almost every mistake in the book, I’ve discovered and enjoyed using 10 counter-intuitive yet powerful steps…with amazing, God-blessed results. So has each member of my immediate family. So have many in my church. I pray that’s your experience, too!

First, love your friend unconditionally.

Second, invite your friend to tell his or her story. When they do, just listen. Don’t ask questions. Don’t interrupt at all, except to quickly affirm that you’re actively listening.

Third, be unshockable. Truth be told, we’ve all broken the Ten Commandments, at least in our heart. Confession is good for the soul, so let your friend just talk. Don’t react to anything he or she says, no matter how ugly or angry. They’re not angry at you, even if it sounds that way. 

Fourth, after your friend has finished talking, remain quiet. Keep listening. While on business in Orlando I met a man named Leonard who poured out his heart to me. I didn’t say a word. I just kept listening intently. When he was done, I kept looking into Leonard’s angry, deeply hurt eyes and didn’t say anything. After a minute, with deepest sadness he said, “All I needed was hope and mercy.” What a profoundly haunting lament. Yet if I had started talking, I never would have heard what he needed.

Fifth, once your friend tells you what he or she needs, still don’t say anything. After Leonard told me, “All I needed was hope and mercy,” I remained quiet for another minute. I let my eyes do all the talking. His eyes and facial expressions began to soften and change. Only God’s love can do that. Then Leonard told me, “And by listening to my story, you’ve given me both.”

Sixth, whatever you do, don’t promise to meet your friend’s needs. Often they want to know the answer to their burning question, “Why?” You don’t know. Don’t even try to guess. Speculation will only ruin your credibility. 

Seventh, if you and your friend have a mutual friend who has a strong faith in Jesus Christ, explore the possibility of inviting that mutual friend to join you at some point in the future. If your friend can share his or her story with a second person, it’s often helpful. That mutual friend may be a pastor, a professor, a psychologist, or another respected Christian leader. Or that mutual friend may be an “ordinary” but wise individual you both know you can trust. 

Are you asking for their story?

Eighth, ask your friend if you can pray for him or her. If they’re in agreement, pray right then. Then remind them from time to time that you’re still praying for them. Prayer invites Jesus back into the picture. 

Ninth, at the right time invite your friend to read the Bible with you. Read one of the four Gospels together. As you read, pray that your friend will fall in love with Jesus again. 

Finally, stay in touch with your friend no matter what. Your friendship can’t be contingent on whether or not your friend comes back to faith in Jesus Christ. That’s up to Him, not you. You may have to hang in there for years before your friend re-embraces faith. No problem. 

Never give up on your friendship. True, some will walk away. But never let it be said that you walked away.

 

Editor’s Note: You’re welcome to share these 10 steps with your church. Just be sure to “give honor where honor is due” (Romans 13:7), starting with recognizing the author and source, of course!

 

David Sanford is an author and speaker. His latest book, Loving Your Neighbor: Surprise! It’s Not What You Think, is available wherever good books are sold. His professional biography is posted online at www.linkedin.com/in/drsanford. His personal biography includes his wife, Renée, their five children, and twelve grandchildren (including one in heaven).

 

 

 

 

 


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To help understand. 

Hold_On Stories.

 
 
 

We’ll Know More Monday – Part 1

Part I – The Routine Screen
 
“We’ve set an appointment for you to come back next Monday to review the results of your biopsy. In the meantime, we need to set an appointment with a surgeon.”
 
A whole week? A surgeon?
 
The doctor continued to share the specifics with my husband. Attempting to shake the fog of the anesthesia, I tried forcing my focus on the conversation between them. Though I managed to fumble my glasses into place, the doctor’s face remained fuzzy. I sensed the doctor’s concern only by the serious tone of his voice.
 
It was supposed to be just a routine screen.
 
“The polyp is too large to remove here and is attached near the appendix. Either way, surgery will be required, and will include removing part of the colon. We won’t know the results of the biopsy until next week.”
 
“But if it’s cancerous, perhaps we’ve caught it in time?” I asked, searching for anything positive.
 
“Let’s hope so.” His soft reply offered little in the way of comfort. I can only assume the doctor didn’t wish to give me false hope.
 
Don’t be afraid. Just breathe.
 
I had two choices – be afraid, fret and worry, or rebuke fear.
 
In the car, I broke the silence. “Well, it is what it is. Or it isn’t what it isn’t. Either way, worry changes nothing. We’ll just wait and assume the best.”
 
If my husband said anything at all, I didn’t hear a word, but I sensed his relief. He knew my head was in a good place and that meant everything in the moment.
 
Besides, it’s only seven days. We’ll know more on Monday.
 
I only needed to trust God, hold on, and face Monday on Monday.
 
I know from the core of my faith, nothing catches God by surprise. Why worry or stress over what is or isn’t?
 
“And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life?” Matthew 6:27, NASB
 
Worry changes nothing for positive, but God can change anything. What will be, will be. My life is in God’s hands – always, not just in this moment.
 
Maybe you’ve received recent news, feeling sucker-punched in the gut and struggling to wrap your head around it. Maybe you are still waiting for test results – a wait torturing your thoughts with fear. Maybe you are fighting for your life, growing wearier every day.
 
Whether you are just beginning to slip into the shadows of worry or feeling completely engulfed in the darkness of despair, leaning into the light of your faith can change your perspective of everything.
 
 
 “Then Jesus again spoke to them, saying, “I am the Light of the world; he who follows Me will not walk in the darkness, but will have the Light of life.” John 8:12, NASB
 
As a child, I feared the dark, or rather, I feared the unknown lurking in the dark. At night, I always managed to find more courage with a single night light strategically placed in the dark hallway to light the path from my room to the bathroom. The soft glow of one small light changed my perspective of what was, or rather, wasn’t lurking in that dark, creepy hallway.
 
As an adult, in some child-like way, I equate that to the Light of Jesus keeping my path lit by the words of my Lord, my relationship with Him, and my belief and faith in Him. He changes my perspective of everything.
 
Jesus clearly states He is the Light of the world. For me, the idea of facing anything in this life without Jesus strikes more fear in me than the situation itself. While weak humanity allows the strength of my faith some vulnerable exposure, I praise the Lord for sustaining me, strengthening me, and chasing away the shadows and darkness of this world.
 
My answers were a week away. Whenever a shadow of fear began to descend, I sought the Light to chase it away and reminded myself, “We’ll know more on Monday.”
 

 

(Editor’s note:  This is Part I of a three-part series – a personal account of recent experiences regarding a routine colonoscopy screen. I hope you’ll follow this series to its final installment – and never postpone health screens.)
 

 

Rita Halter Thomas is a staff writer for Prophecy Simplified, providing HOLD ON Stories to encourage you to hold on to your faith. She is a pastor’s wife and the mother of a college missions major.  She is also an award-winning writer, the founder of The Write Editor, http://thewriteeditor.com, and a former newspaper and magazine publisher with 23 years’ experience in print and digital media. Follow her on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram.
 
  

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